First Person Singular by Wendy Braitman

Single Anxiety, Debunked

When I’ve surveyed single people about what they most fear, what regularly comes up is the anxiety of aging and dying alone. That’s why I love this tweet by Saeed Jones, distilling comments made by Rebecca Traister, author of All the Single Ladies.

Guilty Pleasures

What’s your favorite candy these days?

Kitkat wrapper sculpture by Paul Rousso

Redefining Your Soulmate

I’m intrigued by this definition of a soulmate by Rabbi Sharon Brous who leads the wonderful congregation that I belong to:

“In Judaism, your bashert—a Yiddish word that roughly translates to ‘bestowed’—is your destined partner. But I also like the Jewish notion of a hevruta, or learning partner. That’s the person who pushes and challenges you. It’s not about finding someone who completes you; it’s about finding someone who gives you the opportunity to complete yourself.”

What I read into this definition is that it opens up the possibility of a soulmate being not just a romantic partner, but a friend, a teacher, a mentor. And in my life, it’s comforting to know a few people who fit that bill. What do you think about this?

P.S. For FPS readers in career transition – check out my latest career change blog post on putting your network to work.

Photo from Things Organized Neatly

Fit for a Queen

Yesterday morning, I went early to the Farmer’s Market, and scored big. For the first time this season, there were good cherry tomatoes. I also bought my first melon of the summer and some beautiful white and yellow corn. Last night for dinner, I grilled my bounty – including red peppers, and baby carrots, which I glazed in a balsamic vinaigrette. Accompanied by my nightly chilled martini, it was a perfect meal. I treated myself like royalty, because I deserve it.

Illustration by Marc Johns

Stepping Into the Abyss

I usually like to sign off for the weekend with good cheer. But the Brexit news from Britain is so destabilizing. It feels like the beginning of a global armageddon. I hope and pray that U.S. voters do their research, dig deep, and for all our sakes, reach a different conclusion.

Upcoming New Yorker cover from Barry Blitt

Quieting the Inner Critic

I got my teeth cleaned today. My dental hygienist is superb at what she does, but rides her patients pretty hard. Scraping away at the plaque, she admonished me about a few spots that needed more attention. In that moment I must have groaned, and thinking I got hurt, the hygienist asked with alarm, “are you ok?” In fact, I was refecting the pain of being a teeth-cleaning failure.

Illustration by Ella Frances Sanders

Oyster Bar

Drawing by Mie Yim

Happy Summer

It’s sweltering here. How’s your weather?

Painting by Julita Malinowska

Diving Right In

Lately, I’ve been writing about reaching beyond your comfort zone. On Saturday night, I decided to take my advice. I RSVP’d yes to a house-warming party way across town, hosted by a friend’s friend who I only met once, where it was unlikely that I would know anyone. As a motivating force, I thought it could be an opportunity to network. During the week leading up to the festivities, I gave myself pep talks, remembering that guests at the party won’t notice that I’m alone. It’s not like there’s a LOSER sign pasted on my back. I set a tangible goal. If I could hand out one business card, it would be a success. I arrived at the party and surveyed the sea of strangers. Should I go to the bar first or head straight into the crowd. Frozen in place, a man came up to me and said that he was hired by the host to socialize with people who looked adrift. BUSTED!! We chatted amiably for 20 minutes, I handed him my business card, and turned around and went home.

Illustration by Ella Frances Sanders

End of Week Zen

After Orlando and this harrowing week, I feel grateful to experience another day. Happy weekend!

Illustration by Marc Johns