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The Security of Dry Goods
What is it about stowing a massive amount of toilet paper in the pantry that gives me a sense of calm? Perhaps it makes me feel close to my mother, although calm is not how I’d describe her, or any facet of our relationship, but I do have a sweet memory of her loading up basement shelves with more than enough toilet paper and containers of Campbell soup to get the family through any emergency.
When I’m looking for massive amounts of almost anything, I go to Costco, with whom I have a love/hate relationship. I love the well-priced hunk of Parmigiano-Reggiano, the jugs of Vodka, the mammoth bags of chicken tenders and dog biscuits. The downside is putting up with a jammed parking lot, a back-breaking amount of square footage to cover, and the tubs of ranch dressing that make you wonder, how big is your family that you could actually consume this?
When I’m at Costco, I want to get in and out quickly, so I rarely flirt with the impulse buy. (I do admit to a weakness for small kitchen appliances and Tupperware-like storage containers.) Today, in the “dental” corridor, I eyed the electric toothbrush selection, as mine no longer holds its charge. There was no selection really, a lone model with dual handles, as in, spouses sharing a bathroom, and an electric toothbrush base.
I glanced at the 30 jumbo rolls of toilet paper in my cart, and was glad to have something to soften the blow.
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