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FIRST PERSON SINGULAR: Notes from an Unmarried Life, is a site about surviving, thriving and sometimes just getting through a “single” day.


Not every woman marries. Not even when she’s warm, attractive, good at her job, kind to neighbors. Not even when she can pull from her closet a little black dress, bake a pie, and dance to the beat. I’m an expert.

The numbers of women living on their own has skyrocketed over the last twenty years. We’re nearly half of all American women. Magazines are devoted to us, politicians court our votes, and brokers are making it easier for us to get home loans. That doesn’t mean a single life is always easy. It’s not. We’ve been envied, feared, vilified and pitied throughout history, and much of the time, misunderstood. Who are we, anyway?

Single women rely on their judgment, manage their finances, orchestrate their social lives, paint their lips and walls any colors they wish, and get to choose the window or the aisle. They are resilient and agile, because they have to be, create networks for support, pursue travel, romance, ambitious careers and personal fulfillment with a freedom married women dream about. With all this good news, why aren’t we more at ease? Popular culture is just catching up with our demographics, and we still have explaining to do, not only to family, colleagues, places of worship, and high school reunion committees, but to ourselves. How did we get here? Are we to blame? How can we get enough physical intimacy? Where do we find companionship? Where to seat us at weddings?

Find out here.