filed in Myths and stereotypes
Wear More Dresses and Other Unsolicited Marital Advice
Let’s keep this conversation going. See yesterday.
Image: Geoff McFetridge
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16 comments for “Wear More Dresses and Other Unsolicited Marital Advice”
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Great art for this one, wendy. I don’t like being told, with a frowny face, that I shouldn’t go out with younger guys because all they care about is one thing. Well, duh. Who’s zoomin’ who?
“You’re too intimidating. Not everyone needs to know right away how smart you are.”
“You probably shouldn’t talk politics with people until they know you long enough to know how great you are.”
“Have you thought about ditching the glasses and wearing contacts or getting laser eye surgery instead?”
“You look so young for your age. Aside from the video games, why won’t you consider going out with someone 15 years younger than you?”
“You should start going to church. So-and-so met her husband through church.” (My response to this is always that I don’t think God wants me using His church as a singles bar…that’s usually enough to get them to stop saying this one to me.)
Them: “I know a great guy who would really like you!” Me: “Great, will you introduce me?” Them: “Sure!” (….and said introduction never happens. My sister has pulled this one on me more times than I can count.)
I’d better stop now…my frustration with this routine is building…
I’ve heard variations of so many of these. But I do think using houses of worship as a way to connect with community (including potential dates) is a reasonable idea – assuming it’s a place you actually enjoy going to, and it’s filled with people you like.
I love this artist, Geoff McFetridge. I’ve posted his work a few other times, as well:
http://bit.ly/jRKKXS
http://bit.ly/d6WsYf
@Wendy – Church probably wouldn’t be a bad idea, except that I consider myself to be “spiritual, not religious”, so it’s probably not the best place for me to be. I’ve had too many issues at too many churches in the past, and I don’t have such a similar belief system anymore, lol.
Stacey, I get your point. I am fortunate to belong to a synagogue that’s amazing, with a dynamic community and enlightened clergy. I’ve met many friends by going there. So far, no dates.
In my case the great guy they want to introduce me to ends up being not so great, hence why I no longer have an interest in blind dating.
@Dienna – I’ve not been on enough blind dates to discard it just yet, but I’ll keep that in mind, lol. It just bugs me that my sister does that over and over, and so far, not one single introduction…and it’s been more than 20 years since the first time she’s done that.
“Have you thought about ditching the glasses and wearing contacts or getting laser eye surgery instead?”
One of my favorites… I get this “advise” mostly from our young interns or trainees. Teens who wouldn’t be caught dead wearing glasses.
There are worse things, I discovered in the last 30 years. Inoperable strabismus is just something you have to accept. The glasses are a part of me/the package.
Glasses are sexy. I’ve always been drawn to men who wear them. There’s a great eyeglass store near me called LA Eyeworks. And I have to control myself from buying too many pairs.
@Carolin – I actually checked into laser eye surgery almost as soon as I knew it existed, and my ophthalmologist told me that I wasn’t a good candidate (my eyes change all the time on their own).
As for contacts, I won’t consider them two reasons. (1) I can’t fathom the idea of poking myself in the eye, and (2) My sister started using them when she was 16 years old, and she had terrible crow’s feet before she was 30. The skin around the eyes is so fragile, and I have the kind of vanity where I prefer to hide my eyes behind glasses instead of ruining my skin forever to get out from behind them. (And as a result, I’m told often that I look much younger than I am.)
“You don’t really want it, if you did, you’d make it happen.”
Stacey, have you asked recently? I checked into LASIK when it first became widely available (about 10 years ago), and was told at that time I wasn’t a candidate. I had successful LASIK about a year and a half ago. Now, I did it for *me.* I was sick to death of wearing glasses, not having peripheral vision (my vision was TERRIBLE, so I couldn’t see anything outside of the immediate frame of my lenses) and consequently having a strained neck from looking down at the sidewalk and tripping over things when I wasn’t looking down; not being able to function (shower, shave, put on makeup…nothing) without my glasses; etc. I’m a better athlete and much happier now that I’ve had it done. But, again, it was all for me.
I have heard it all myself. I even ran into a young man 16 years my junior who is into everything I am: history, horseback riding, and running. Wasn’t sure if he had sex on the brain like other men his age, but I was sort of happy we could talk about our common interests. One day he pitched a fit at work and I was like “never mind this one…he needs to grow up.” I am still cordial to him, but it hasn’t been the same.
I usually wear contacts to run and ride. Glasses are for everything else.
16 years younger has its plusses and minuses. Sounds like fun, though.
Unless they’ve figured out a way for Lazik to fix the fact that my eyes change on their own all the time, then it’s still not for me. I’ve never had an eye exam where my prescription hadn’t changed significantly – sometimes my eyes improve, sometimes they get worse, and I’ve never had an eye doctor who’s been able to figure out why. I’ve gotten to the point where I have my diabetes screenings right before I have my eye appointments, just so I can tell my ophthalmologiest that no, I am not diabetic. Even with all the advances, I don’t think Lazik can fix that.