First Person Singular by Wendy Braitman

End of Week Zen: Let Yourself Be Happy

Today would’ve been my mother’s birthday. I woke up filled with gratitude for all that she gave me, and even when she came up short, I understand (after years of therapy) that she tried her best. Despite a good life that included a wonderful husband and marriage, my mother was not especially good at being happy. This week, while in synagogue, the Rabbi talked about a hospice nurse who spent years with dying patients, and then wrote about their five biggest regrets. Not choosing happiness was among them. A few FPS readers have made reference to this idea, when formulating their single vow. Does this resonate for you?

My hope for all of us is a very happy weekend!

Keep This Handy

Illustration by Michael Dumontier and Neil Farber

Off For Atonement and Renewal

This is the time of year among my tribe when we take 25 hours off for atonement, reflection and new beginnings. We examine our vows, get a reprieve from those we didn’t fulfill, and make another round of pledges and commitments. As I contemplate these weighty issues (on an empty stomach no less), consider a vow to yourself. Share it with us, and you could win a really cool prize.

 Mural by Hyuro. Photo by Dustin Chambers 

Dive In!

Enter our new CONTEST.

Drawing by Shel Silverstein, the great cartoonist and writer born on this day in 1930.

Contest: What is Your Single Vow?

It’s wonderful to give. We feel good about it. We celebrate with loved ones for their engagements, weddings, anniversaries, baby arrivals, and are happy to send along a gift to honor these joyous occasions. But today is your opportunity to get. FPS is launching a new contest, and an exciting new tradition that we’re calling a “SINGLE registry.” It’s our way to celebrate and honor being single. The winner will get a $50 gift certificate to Crate and Barrel. To enter, answer the question: what vow will you make to yourself? It can be far reaching in scope or concerned with minutiae. Submit your entry using the Comments section. Include your first name. If you win, we’ll email for your U.S. shipping address, and telephone number. By submitting you’ll become an FPS subscriber (if you’re not already). If you have any questions, please ask. Deadline to enter is October 5.

Study for First Face, 1967, by Tom Wesselmann

At Home With a Sick Dog

My dog Rose and I enjoy the mornings. We wake up alert, ready to go. But this morning, my spunky, sturdy Rose was listless. She snubbed her nose at food and water and barely moved from a defensive crouch behind the chair. As I looked into her mournful eyes, I wished she could tell me what was wrong. After an anxious day, I brought her to the Vet. Rose has a gastrointestinal infection, and is now on a regimen of probiotics, antibiotics, and this being California, perhaps some version of downward facing dog.

Image by Royal Art Lodge

Are You Generous When You Gaze in the Mirror?

Mirror Mirror by Rick Finkelstein

Why It’s Good to Love Your Neighbor

Last year, when I moved into my condo, I was new to apartment living. In San Francisco, I’d inhabited “flats.” And for my first decade in Los Angeles, I lived in a free standing home. These days in my building, I bump into people in the elevator, at the mailbox, by the trash bin. We’re neighbors and also co-owners of common space, so there’s real incentive to be cordial. We have to work together to solve problems. A few days ago, we had a small fire in the garage and had to evacuate at midnight. (No real damage.) For a single person, it’s a marriage of strange bedfellows, and in a way, it keeps me limber. How do you get along with your neighbors?

Image via Stuff and Son

Is It Satisfying to Buy Your Own Jewelry?

During the Christmas season, my friend who manages an upscale women’s boutique, attends to customers’ husbands who shop for gifts. She steers them to the jewelry case, and since she knows her clientele well, is able to offer this expert advice: “Buy your wife something she already wants.” On a few occasions, boyfriends have surprised me with jewelry, and though I was moved by the sentiment, those pieces sit in the box. The jewelry I wear the most are the bracelets, necklaces and earrings that I admired, dreamed about, agonized over, decided I couldn’t live without, and purchased for myself. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry?

Image: Today is the 175^th anniversary of Tiffany’s. This box of jewels is from a recent ad campaign.

Drawing Inspiration from Sacred Space

(Still in holyday mode. Back tomorrow.)

“It is gratefulness which makes the soul great.” Abraham Joshua Heschel

 Artwork by Daniel Everett