A few of mine:
– Apologize
– Visit friends in the hospital
– Ballet class
– Make potato pancakes for a crowd (Hanukkah’s coming and I’m envisioning wiping grease from the stove and kitchen floor.)
– Give family members the benefit of the doubt
What’s on YOUR list?
Photo of New York City Ballet dancer by Henry Leutwyler
Seeing my mother bald from chemo.
Walking into a horrible job every day.
Listening and congratulating people who are making positive life changes in the midst of your own personal grief.
Trying to hold on to friendships that have passed their expiration date.
These are beautiful heather. Very vivd and true.
Learning that I must place more value on my free time by saying “no” to demands of others. Just because I’m single doesn’t mean I have nothing to do.
Learning to speak up for myself more when I feel something isn’t right rather than just accepting things as they are.
Both of these things feel uncomfortable right now, but I know I must do them anyway.
Giving others (in addition to family members) the benefit of the doubt.
Seeing the best in everyone.
Being open to new ideas and viewpoints.
I can relate to these, Kathy. And the first one on your list has particular meaning for me. There have been times when married friends haven’t understood that one can be exceptionally busy without a husband and kids.
Going to family wedding
Conflict
Graduate school
Letting go of judgement (Not proud of this one)
I’ve gotten a bit better about the judgement thing as I’ve gotten older. But I have to really stay conscious about it.
1. Apologizing is high on my list, too. Especially when I know I have to apologize to someone who still owes me an apology, but I know they’re never going to do it, and I have to find a way to be OK with it. I don’t use that as an excuse to not do the apology I need to do because that’s not the person I want to be, but having that knowledge does make it really hard to do.
2. Telling a man that, while I appreciate his attention, I’m just not intersted in him in that way.
3. Keeping my mouth shut in the heat of anger. I recently went to my nephew’s wedding, and my sister, the mother of the groom, was having meltdown after meltdown for the week preceding the big day. I finally reached the point where I knew that anything I said, no matter how angry or reconciliatory it was, was just going to make the situation worse. I thought of a million ways to verbally take her down, but I chose the high road and said nothing. Didn’t even speak to her until after the wedding was over…and that was the best, but most difficult, choice. We were able to speak to each as human beings then.
4. Some days, just getting out of bed is on this list. The days are getting colder and it’s just so darn comfortable under the warm blankets!
Great list, Stacey. Thanks for sharing it.