Hearts Alert
Be forewarned. It must be the official start of the Valentines Day marketing blitz. Walking with my dog around the neighborhood today, I was bombarded with multiple hearts sightings. A worker was stringing up heart-shaped decorations on the terrace of a local restaurant. In the window of a fitness store, they were advertising heart shakes, and a comedy club was promoting its Valentines show with, you guessed it, hearts. I’m not seriously bothered by this holiday, but the motif is so predictable, and it gets old, fast. As a remedy, I’ve been collected inspiring heart art, which I’ll be posting regularly. If you come across any great images, send them my way.
Illustration by Marc Johns
What Defines Us?
This afternoon during jury selection for a murder trial, I sat for hours in the courtroom, heart racing, wondering whether I’d be called to serve. As the judge interviewed those ahead of me, I thought it’s not often we’re asked to state in a loud, clear voice, whether we’re married or not to a group of strangers. But in court today, it was one of the questions we were required to answer: Area of residence, occupation, marital status, occupation of spouse, number of children. The jury was chosen before the judge got around to me, and for so many reasons, I was thrilled.
Latest Puzzle of Online Dating
I’m trying to remain a good sport, but this tugs at my patience. On Saturday, I got two flirty emails from a cute guy who I actually found intriguing. We share common areas of interest – politically, culturally, gastronomically – and even though his neighborhood is slightly beyond my geographic comfort zone, I was definitely game to meet him for coffee. This rarely happens. I responded the next morning with a short, but sweet reply. That was 36 hours ago. Yes, he could still get back to me. But the rhythm of these things is if someone is interested, they respond right away. Here’s my confusion. Why did he start the conversation in the first place?
Artwork by Sandra Autukaite
Pet-Related Sleep Deprivation
I envy my dog’s ability to sleep 10 hours a night. Except for last night, when Rose began getting restless, eventually jumping down from the bed at 3 AM. It was pouring rain and the last thing I wanted to do was go outside. I tried to cajole her back under the covers with a treat, cutting my hand in the process, which I didn’t notice at first, until I turned on the light and saw the bloody sheet. I went into the bathroom, got a Band-Aid, then layered on another one, because the bleeding was pretty bad. And I had one of those “being single moments of terror” thinking, okay, I’m here alone, it’s the middle of the night, what happens if I need to go to the emergency room? Back to my dog. She refused the treat, so I knew something was up. I searched for my boots and an umbrella (we don’t have much weather here in L.A.), keeping my hand elevated, and staggered downstairs. Sure enough, Rose was sick. She’s fine today. My hand is recovering nicely. I’m exhausted.
Insomnia by Brad Philips
Do We Need To Mix It Up?
It’s probably perverse that I enjoy reading articles about what makes marriages last. (Maybe it’s to get to the parts where they unravel.) In a piece from the Times, I learned that couples experience less wedded joy after two years, as the relationship gets more predictable. According to a study, one effective strategy for staying happier longer is introducing a novel activity into the marriage that’s exciting, rather than just pleasant. Like rock climbing, instead of checking out a new restaurant for dinner. As a single person, I have to translate this kind of couple-y advice into something relevant to my life, so I wondered if there’d be an upside to my also seeking out more adventure. Just not tonight. Tonight, I’ll be happily sunk into the couch with my dog.
Artwork by Ben Eine
Not Going Negative Report Back
With 4+ hours to go, results have been mixed. Early in the day, I doubled down by trying not only not to go negative but to make a point of saying nice things to people. That didn’t last. Listening to political pundits describing the Inauguration provided a real challenge, as did like-minded friends complaining about the pundits. I snark-tweeted twice before realizing it. Most interesting about the experience has been analyzing the catalyst for going negative. At times it was envy, irritability and trash talking as a way of bonding with someone else. How about you?
Archive for January, 2013
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