filed in Happy Ever After
Marriage? Who Cares.
This is a must-read article about how the Dutch approach marriage.
Illustration by Martin Sichetti
Discussion
8 comments for “Marriage? Who Cares.”
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Great article. I fear that marriage is essential to our economic system and it’s very difficult to circumvent this reality. That said, I’m totally up for the challenge of both creating acceptance for alternative life choices and transforming what marriage stands for.
I believe we’re all going to help change people’s minds.
Even though I don’t always agree with her (she sometimes tries a bit too hard to be contrary), I must say that I do always enjoy Katie Roiphe’s writing. Looks like I’ll have to invest in “In Praise of Messy Lives”. I do love that she champions those of us who don’t fit into the usual (conformist) order of things. Thanks for the link, Wendy!
Not a fan either, but I loved this piece.
Great article-thanks for the link!
I plan on re-reading. It’s inspiring.
About a month ago I had a personal epiphany that has totally changed the way I think about marriage. It’s so profound to me and yet the most simple of concepts: marriage doesn’t matter to me. I can actually choose not to worry about getting married and just live my best life as a single. I’m even more than a little convinced that single is who I am and that’s how I will be my most authentic self. Sounds all self-helpie, but it’s really been a game changer in terms of the anxiety I was feeling being in my late 30s and never married with no man in sight.
This article is in line with what I’ve been suspecting about marriage from a cultural standpoint. That it’s drummed into us from a very young age and it’s not a requirement. Our cultural rites of passage are just that…cultural and we can take them or leave them.
I am sure that the future will be better for singles as more marriages end in divorce and more people stay single whether by choice or circumstance.
I have fleeting moments where I catch myself envying good partnerships. But then I recalibrate and remember it’s all about not taking for granted the wonders of every day. It’s not just a platitude, I really feel that.