filed in Sex and Dating
State of Play
Tinder Match by Adam Hillman
Discussion
14 comments for “State of Play”
Leave a Reply
About this Site
FIRST PERSON SINGULAR is a guide to surviving, thriving and sometimes just getting through a single day. Created by Wendy Braitman (more…)
Follow First Person Singular
Greatest Hits
© 2010 First Person Singular. 
I’ve had periods of being “on” and “off” dating sites. I’ve had some ok luck in meeting perfectly nice guys, no horror stories actually. Just nothing really worked out.
I’m definitely in an off phase. Looking for some inspiration to get back on.
I do six months on, six months off.
Where are you now in the cycle?
I hate online dating! I’m actually trying to get out and meet more people organically.
Wendy, do you meet many men/ potential dates in your everyday routine or social pursuits? Just curious.
No, Dee. I don’t. At my synagogue, where there’s the biggest influx of new faces, they’re mostly married.
Downloaded tinder while out with girl friends because none of us knew how it worked. Didn’t upload any info of myself. I lurked and swiped a few days and got discouraged at what I saw. So I deleted it. But I may actually try it eventually, when I move out of my parents. Just moved back home this summer and house hunting is slow going. I feel wierd about actively dating when I don’t have my own home!
I enourage you to try it. But why wait? What’s weird about dating when you don’t have your own home? Who’s going to care?
I’m on the freebies, Tinder and OK Cupid. I’m having no luck on either. I’m ready to delete them both. Did the Match scene for 6 months and oh, hey, still single! I’m with Dee and would like to go back to meeting men in the real world first. I miss the chase/challenge of that (i.e. waiting to call, no caller id, no automatic response…think Jon Favreau in Swingers!) Do I miss that? Now that I say it out loud it seems ridiculous. I often think I have a more difficult time because I live in a tiny rural town but my metropolitan girlfriends are having just as much trouble.
I’ve always lived in cities and that hasn’t helped me.
Just deleted the OK Cupid profile after a year. I met some nice guys, but it became more and more discouraging. I’m trying to own the fact that it is indeed more fun to hang out at home with the cat than go on another bad date. *sigh*
What would be the downside of keeping your OK profile up?
Good question. It’s not directed at me, but I wanted to share my thoughts. I’ve used online dating in the past (only went out with one guy that I met online). For me, leaving my profile up felt like I was on display…it’s like a strange vulnerability. I found the quality of men to be so bad that I didn’t want them viewing my profile. I realize that may sound snobby or something, but I just couldn’t bear to leave it up when I was checked out of the process.
That doesn’t sound snobby at all. It sounds prudent.