First Person Singular by Wendy Braitman

Child’s Play

Illustration by Malika Favre for the New Yorker

Worry Diet

Years ago during the Iraq war, I knew a Rabbi whose son was in the military and stationed there. I couldn’t imagine how he dealt with the fear for his son’s safety. The Rabbi (who was also a former Marine) explained that the only way he could manage the anxiety was by strictly limiting his worrying to 15 minutes a day. During those 15 minutes, he would really go for it, allowing all his darkest fears to surface. But by keeping a rigid boundary around the worry, it didn’t infect the rest of his day-to-day life. I’m going to try this.

Print by Friedrich Kunath

Failing Forward

I talk with my Coaching clients about giving their ideas a test run. You learn in the process to keep what works and discard what doesn’t. And I’ve heard that described as “failing forward.” I love that concept. It really reframes failure.

Illustration by Adam J Kurtz

It’s Time to Focus on Food. Thanksgiving’s Coming

What dish(es) are you making or most looking forward to eating?

Photo: Peas on a Plate, 1978 by Sandy Skoglund

Staying Neutral

When I was prepping for a recent San Francisco trip, I made sure not to pack clothes with color. Since relocating to L.A. 15 years ago, I’ve expanded my wardrobe palette beyond black, brown and grey, but I know better than revealing this in the Bay Area. The other thing I had to keep under wraps was rooting for the Dodgers in the World Series. My SF friends are diehard Giants fans (which means they loathe the Dodgers) and they had no room for that. 

Illustration by Ella Frances Sanders

I LOVE Virginia!!!

For the first time in a year, I feel like I can breathe.

Stubbornly Favorite Tools

This post is inspired by the book, The Secret Life of the Pencil, which features the writing tools of a variety of artists. (This particular pencil is owned by the writer Dave Eggers.) That got me to thinking about what helps me be creative. At first, I thought about an old cheese grater I frequently use, even though I have newer, spiffier models. But I’m also very stubborn about notebooks. I love the brand, Miquelrius, because of their cover art, the size between the lines and the way that they bend. What’s one of your favorite tools?

Reclaiming Joy

In my job as a Career Coach, when guiding a client who’s trying to figure out what work they want to do next, I ask them about peak experiences. When was a time they felt fully immersed? Tending a garden, training for a marathon, hiking Machu Picchu. Or eating ice cream on a hot summer day. And then I ask why.

Photo from The Anonymous Project

Bureacracy of Street Repair

I’ve become an expert in “raised asphalt.” It’s the term the City of Los Angeles uses for big bumps in the road. I know this term because for 4 months, I’ve been actively trying to get the asphalt repaired on a stretch of road that I take almost every day. The bump was so high it sent shock waves through my body each time my car crossed over it. It took more than a dozen phone calls to 3 different entities, including a member of the City Council. What finally pushed me across the finish line was a plea to the Mayor’s office, where I was put in touch with the “Infrastructure Supervisor.” Once I reached her, the repair was made in 3 days. #GovernmentWorks

Print by Anthony Burrill

Teachable Moments

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve gotten better at not looking at my past mistakes with regret, because regret feels so powerless. I can’t change what happened, but I can learn from it. 

Photo by Paul Garcia