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Couples Plus One
This weekend, I was in San Francisco to celebrate a few joyous occasions. A friend recently got married (quietly, his second), and a member of my extended family boisterously became engaged (his first). We lounged around the table at one of the Bay Area’s great restaurants, toasting with champagne. Sandwiched in the middle, I was probably the only one to notice there were 5 couples alongside me. Oh well. Sometimes, that’s just life. (The roast chicken was fabulous!)
Illustration by Geoff McFetridge
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Sandwiched in the middle is nice. Not so nice is when you get seated at the end of the table and the servers keeping bumping into you (or, in my case, having a plate of spaghetti dropped on me).
You’re right, Amy. I had a prime seat. It was a very noisy restaurant and I could hear everyone.
It sounds like you had a nice time, Wendy….however I wonder if you ever begrudge the time and money that you spend on a trip like this? Next weekend I’ll be attending the third family wedding for this year. In addition, two family members have had babies & I’ve attended an engagement/Baptism party as well. It’s hard to shower other people with congratulatory attention that’s never reciprocated, especially when many of the people who I see at these gatherings have a meh attitude towards me & my life.
It’s always a pleasure for me to visit San Francisco, as I spent over 20 years living there. I had a great time, worth every dollar. Why do you think that the people at these gatherings have a “meh” attitude towards your life?
I’ve often been with Meghan — somewhat begrudging of buying a dozen+ bridesmaid dresses, caboodle of first and second engagement/wedding/baby gifts, and travel to said festivities in recent years — when like congratulatory attention doesn’t come my way. In my experience, single milestones go largely unacknowledged. No one’s gifted me with a Kitchenaid or fluffy bath towels, etc., and some say I don’t understand “adult life” since I’m facing it solo. They imagine my life is more immediately post-collegiate, as theirs were when they were single. Lately, I’ve made a concerted effort to let it go lest bitterness grow. I’m happy to report it’s working.
It was such a delightful surprise when two friends sent me a housewarming gift to celebrate my new condo purchase. Instead of feeling an entitled “it’s about time someone acknowledged me,” I experienced a delightful wave of festive validation.
Also: many thanks, Wendy, for posting about your own condo purchase. You gave such valuable inspiration and guidance and a hopeful vision of the possibility.
I love that your friends sent you a housewarming gift. If you feel like sharing, what did you get?
Yes! Very delightful: A pair of Fermob chairs for my tiny balcony (when the weather turns seasonable), that will double as overflow dining-room seating (whenever I’ve cleared out the cardboard). And, from others, a Williams-Sonoma gift card I may apply towards a refurbished VitaMix, for which I haven’t yet been able to splurge.
I’m so excited (and a bit envious) to hear that you have Fermob chairs. I love them!! Which ones did you get?