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Why It’s Good to Love Your Neighbor

September 19, 2012

Last year, when I moved into my condo, I was new to apartment living. In San Francisco, I’d inhabited “flats.” And for my first decade in Los Angeles, I lived in a free standing home. These days in my building, I bump into people in the elevator, at the mailbox, by the trash bin. We’re neighbors and also co-owners of common space, so there’s real incentive to be cordial. We have to work together to solve problems. A few days ago, we had a small fire in the garage and had to evacuate at midnight. (No real damage.) For a single person, it’s a marriage of strange bedfellows, and in a way, it keeps me limber. How do you get along with your neighbors?

Image via Stuff and Son

Is It Satisfying to Buy Your Own Jewelry?

September 18, 2012

During the Christmas season, my friend who manages an upscale women’s boutique, attends to customers’ husbands who shop for gifts. She steers them to the jewelry case, and since she knows her clientele well, is able to offer this expert advice: “Buy your wife something she already wants.” On a few occasions, boyfriends have surprised me with jewelry, and though I was moved by the sentiment, those pieces sit in the box. The jewelry I wear the most are the bracelets, necklaces and earrings that I admired, dreamed about, agonized over, decided I couldn’t live without, and purchased for myself. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry?

Image: Today is the 175th anniversary of Tiffany’s. This box of jewels is from a recent ad campaign.

Drawing Inspiration from Sacred Space

September 17, 2012

(Still in holyday mode. Back tomorrow.)

“It is gratefulness which makes the soul great.” Abraham Joshua Heschel

 Artwork by Daniel Everett

Jumping Into 5773

September 14, 2012

When the Jewish New Year of 5773 begins at sunset on Sunday, it initiates a period known as the Days of Awe. When I was growing up, I skimmed  the surface of these holidays, just happy to get a few days off from school and parade around in my pretty fall clothes. Now, it’s more of a spiritual exploration, a chance for renewal. What do I want to do differently this year? On my 5773 to-do list: Assume the best of people (especially while driving). Worry less. Celebrate more. Date.

Falling in Trees by Elijah Gowin

What’s Luck Got To Do With It?

September 13, 2012

 

“Lucky” neon light available at Rockett St. George

In Praise of Unconventional Beauty

September 12, 2012

I just learned the French term “jolie laide,” which literally means “pretty-ugly,” but implies beauty that’s unexpected, unconventional and oddly compelling. I was never a pretty girl, so I find hope in this phrase. The image above is a mural painted by a New Zealand artist, Rone in a very seedy district of San Francisco. The juxtaposition of the pretty-ugly (with street signs as part of the tableau) is what makes this so winning, and an apt reflection of what life feels like, sometimes. If you’re in San Francisco, visit Rone’s show at the White Walls gallery. The mural is at Olive and Larkin.

Can You Relate to This?

September 11, 2012

I’ve whined about numbers 5, 6 and yes, also 3. How about you?

Illustration from Michael Dumontier an Neil Farber

 

Holding On and Letting Go

September 10, 2012

9/11 is hours away. Fall is approaching. Here’s an excerpt from In Blackwater Woods by the poet Mary Oliver, who is 77 today:

To live in this world

you must be able
to do three things:
to love what is mortal;
to hold it

against your bones knowing
your own life depends on it;
and, when the time comes to let it go,

 

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End of Week Tweak: How to Behave Better

September 7, 2012

For starters, I’m going to work on #5. What about you?

Image via Rolu

Finding the Road to Satisfaction

September 6, 2012

Daniel Kahneman, the Nobel-prize winning psychologist, has a theory about happiness that he calls “focusing illusion.” Kahneman suggests that people draw the wrong conclusions and often make flawed decisions, by giving too much weight to what we imagine will bring us sustained happiness, like having more money, moving to California, and perhaps you could add to this, living with a mate. (I take issue with him about California, because it really is that great.) I’m drawn to his point of view, which if I were to reduce to the barest of bones, is about finding real pleasure in the moment, as opposed to an unreliable construct. But don’t take my word for it. He’s got proof.

Illustration by Christoph Niemann