First Person Singular by Wendy Braitman

Idiot’s Guide to House Cleaning

Under my mother’s watchful eye, our home was immaculate. Not only were the floors spic and span, but the linen closet and kitchen cabinets were so elegantly organized as to be museum worthy. I did not inherit the clean gene. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not a slob. But while some find it therapeutic to break out the Ajax, I’m far happier when someone does the scrubbing for me. Do you like to clean?

Photograph by Guy Batey

It’s International Women’s Day. How About a Hug!

Today, we celebrate the centennial of International Women’s Day, when over one million people attended rallies in support of women’s right to work, vote, be trained, hold public office and be free of discrimination. I’m in awe of the visionary women who took to the streets for their dignity and freedom, paving the way for us all. Case in point: Shirley Chisholm, who was the first black woman elected to Congress, and is seen in this exuberant photo during her 1972 campaign for President.

I Miss My Dad

One of the hardest parts of being single, and what evokes the most envy of my married friends, is not having that one person who is going to put me first (or at least second). In the last year of my father’s life, during our frequent phone conversations, I knew this was the irreplaceable relationship. I was always his #1, with my well being uppermost in his mind. I really miss that.

Image: Dad, 2007, Dana Schutz. See her drawings at the Atlanta Contemporary Art Center.

How To Explain a Bad Hair Day?

Ugh. My hair. It would be easy to chalk it up to mood, but that doesn’t explain why it looked okay on Monday, when I was equally as miserable. How come there’s such variation from day to day, especially in L.A. when it’s mostly sunny and dry? And why does my coif look its best just hours before I’m scheduled for a cut? Can you relate?

Image: Bubble Wrap by Hendrik Kerstens

Playing With My Cat When I Should Be Dating

Image: Lillian Playing with An Abstract Thought by Matte Stephens

What I’d Give For a Good Night’s Sleep

I’ve got the 3 AM blues. OK. Let me be honest. I’ve got the 24-hour blues, but tossing and turning in the dark of night is when it hits me the hardest. I’ve tried meditating, counting backwards from 100, naming all the states in alphabetical order (Alabama, Alaska, Arkansas, Arizona…), remembering 5 good things that happened to me that day, and of course, Ambien. Can you help? What’s your best tip for falling asleep?

Image: Siesta, Paul Gauguin. See his paintings at the National Gallery of Art.

Which Qualities Are Feminine?

Check out this long, elegant list from Gazpachot, a site I love for its visual inspiration. Please add your ideas to the list, or complain about any you disagree with.

Image: Freckles by Matt Siren

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Zen of Not Caring What Others Think

During one horrific time in my life, an unhinged boyfriend with whom I’d just broken up, started spreading vicious lies about me. We were in the same line of work, and it made me sick to think about colleagues hearing these awful things. Would people wonder, even for a moment, if they were true? At the end of the day, I couldn’t stop it from happening. But what got me through the experience, was a friend who assured me that rational people would figure it out. And that’s exactly what happened. I remember this sometimes, when I find myself too invested in imagining what people are saying behind my back.

Image via this isn’t happiness

San Francisco Bound

I’m off into the arms of trusted friends, for a birthday party, the Oscars, and all around soul soothing.

Image: Open Drawers, 2007, Greg Drasler

Books: I Can’t Quit You

In Super Sad True Love Story, a scary sci-fi novel set in the believable near future, it’s become subversive to own books which are considered smelly, like old tennis shoes. The protagonist whispers to his cache of hardcovers, “you’re sacred to me,” expressing my sentiments exactly.

Illustration: Marcos Chin