filed in Daily Life
How to Stay Balanced as the 7th Wheel
I’ve been invited to a dinner party this weekend, and I’ll be the seventh wheel. In other words, there will be 3 couples and me. I’ve been in this situation before, occasionally even around my own dinner table (when I have no one to blame). The asymmetry never stops me, but it always gives me pause. Will I secretly be pitied by the married guests? That’s really the fear isn’t it? I happen to know that the hosts just purchased a new dining room table, and it’s round. So we’ll all be part of one big circle. Circle of love. No problem. I’ve got this.
Artwork by Martin Creed
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12 comments for “How to Stay Balanced as the 7th Wheel”
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The fear of being seen as abnormal. Or not good enough for someone. I’ve been there and I still feel it sometimes. And yet, I don’t think my friends have EVER felt that about me. It’s an obstacle of my own making.
A round dinner table? Oh, how delightful. Have fun at your party.
I might have to ask people at the table if they have any thoughts about this. Maybe after we’ve had cocktails.
Good Idea particularly “after” cocktails
I’ll have more on this soon.
Circle of love sounds awesome!! Ever think you might not be pitied, but envied? Let’s face it, at least one of the three couples will have bickered in the car all the way over to the event.
I think you’re right, Leyla. Makes as much sense for them to have envy as pity. And most likely, they haven’t given it a thought.
I think it’s nice that you have the option/invitation! It always sounds like you have a good social life/friends in your life.
Hope you enjoy the party!
Social life takes effort. This weekend happens to be busy. But I spend plenty of nights alone – and I enjoy that too.
At least you get invited….so many couples don’t bother to include their single friends in dinner parties and similar social events. My “coupled” friends fall into both camps. Enjoy the party.
The hosts are my really good friends. I get invited to their home a lot. But I reciprocate. And to this dinner party I’m bringing a yummy dessert.
I have some friends and family that not only invite me to events where there will be couples only, but make it clear that they WANT me there and that I’m a valued person at the party.
And then I have “friends” that seem to think its awkward to have a single person at their event. And you know what, I realized that those “friends” weren’t friends at all. And I’m ok with that…I have moved on and now associate with those that I find enrich my life and whose lives I enrich.
And I think sometimes people might need educating. See my post today, Lola.